When I was little, May was my favourite month of the year. I think I always loved Springtime and in the month of May, the earth really came alive. The crab apple trees were in full bloom and were my absolute favourite blossoms! I also think that it helped that the letters in the word May could be rearranged to spell my name!
May continued to be my favourite month until about my mid-twenties when my feelings about the month took a drastic change. My husband and I had been married for about 4 years when we decided that we wanted to start a family. At first it was all fun as we waited each month to see what would happen. Those months turned into years. and after extensive medical tests, we were told that our chances of conceiving a child were about 5%. Needless to say, we were devastated. I had always dreamed of having a large family and that dream had just been shattered. Now, the month of May became a time of the year when the ache of being childless peaked as Mother’s Day approached. While it was still an opportunity to celebrate both my mother and mother-in-law, the day felt like a jab to the heart. It was a big old party that I wasn’t invited to. Our friends and family were amazing and showered us with love and support. I received flowers and cute cards from my nephews but it really just wasn’t the same. I began avoiding the day altogether – no church & no large family functions. It had all gotten to be too much to handle. Well meaning people would quietly give me hugs and say, ‘maybe next year.’ It was just easier to skip the day. I share this to remind you to simply be aware of those around you. Many have had to say goodbye to their moms too soon. Some have had to witness their daughters passing. Others have a stressful relationship with their moms that causes pain. We all have our stories and each one is unique. As mother’s day approaches, I challenge you to honour all the ladies in your lives – your mom, your aunts, the lady at the grocery store who takes good care of you, grandmothers and your child’s teacher. I really do think that ALL women should be honoured on Mother’s Day regardless of their matriarchal status, just as I feel ALL men should be honoured on Father’s Day.
Before I let you go though, I have to finish my story first. For those of you who know me well, you know that I am a proud mama to two outstanding boys who are now 8 & 10! With God’s grace, we have 2 miracle babies! We were thrilled to discover after 4 years of trying to conceive, we were pregnant! Want to know the crazy thing? We found out the day after the worst Mother’s Day I had experienced! Want to know something else crazy? We found out the day before Mother’s Day two years later that we were pregnant again! God took something that was so painful and redeemed it into something beautiful. In case you are wondering, May is totally my favourite month of the year again!
If you or someone you know is struggling with infertility, please be encouraged. I got my happy ending & you can too! There are options to explore. We personally explored adoption as a means to grow our family. That journey was not meant to be ours in the end but I know many beautiful families that began this way. Others explore fertility treatments. We all have different paths but in the end, we were put on this earth to love and support each other through joy and pain.
As a nutritionist, I really do have to share this piece of the story as well. Looking back, I see how nutrition played a huge role in increasing my chances at conceiving as well as nourishing our children. It was during this time that I really began looking at food differently than I had before. If you are hoping to begin your family or are having difficulty conceiving, I would be honoured to chat with you about it over a cup of tea.
Photo credit to Sarah from Every Little Wonder Photography